You can get the entire blog and more here.
Otherwise, here is some really good reading from Nikki Washington, CEO
The Marriage Ministry
I don't think people take marriage seriously anymore.
For some it's just something you do so that you can jointly file taxes, or share benefits, or some other silly means of economizing. For some marriage is just a means to cure loneliness or a pass to have guiltless sex. I think somewhere along the way we inherited distorted expectations of marriage.
People are getting married, and finding out that what they thought would be a cure all actually comes with its own set of issues. Did you know that you can be married, and still be lonely? Did you know that you can be married, and still have a broken heart? Did you know that you can be married, and still not be getting any? Now that offically sucks.
Seriously, if you've never done so I want to encourage you to assess your expectations. Are they aligned with God's word? Do you have rose colored glasses on in relation to marriage? Do you really know what marriage means? Marriage has nothing to do with what you can get, but rather what you give. Make no mistake about it, marriage is beauty. But it's also work. It's death to your will. It's sacrifice. It's ministry. I can't speak for you, but I want to see the sanctity of marriage return. I don't want to go to another wedding and wonder if the couple really meant what they said before the preacher.
The question we should ask ourselves is 'Do I have what it takes to work the ministry of marriage?' And then after you ask, be real with yourself. If you know you have areas that require growth, acknowledge them. That's the only way your going to evolve.
I don't know about you, but I'm going to be a great wife. And not because I said so, but because God is yet working on me. My bible reminds me that He who began a good work in me will be faithful to complete it. I'm so glad about that. You should be too. Let God work on you. And while He's working live for goodness sake! Don't wait to get married for life to start. Live now. Love what you live, and appreciate all that is around you.
And I know I'm not going to get any love here, but it's time-out for planning weddings.
Seriously, there is something wrong when you spend your whole life dreaming of a wedding, yet spend very little time thinking about the aftermath. Honestly, what happens after 'I do?' What happens when it's just you and your spouse, and you're faced with moving forward in life? We can't continue to put value on temporal things, and then expect the "things" to get us to the place of purpose. It almost seems as if, some not all, are getting married for the wrong reasons. He was fine. She could cook. He had money. What's up with that??? A nice physique, kitchen skills, nor money can sustain God's agenda for your life. No sir and no ma'am. You don't need someone who can just make the grade right now; you need someone who can push you into purpose 15 years from now.
Amen somebody!
I don't know your testimony but I thank God I didn't marry when the opportunities arose. I wasn't a wife back then. I was young and stupid and didn't have enough foresight to see down the road. I thank God He awakened in me purpose. Understanding my purpose gave way to revelation knowledge, and knowledge helped me to come to the understanding that there is no settlement in God.
The lesson: don't settle.
Don't be so hard pressed to get married that you accept just anyone. I can't express that enough. I'd much rather wait for the right one, than settle down with the wrong one. I speak these things because I want to see God honoring marriages on display. My prayer is that you'll think about the people you allow to be a part of your life and rightly discern them prior to entering into a relationship.
I know some of you are like, "Whatever Nikki! I'm tired, I'm lonely, I'm discouraged, and I don't want to hear another, hold on and be encouraged message." And I hear you. I can't tell you to get to a place where I haven't been. Really what kind of hostess would I be encouraging you to come to the party, and I haven't even hit the dance floor? Honey, know that I'm two-stepping all up and through this message too (smile).
The difference will be found in how you view things.
I've been sad, and I've had joy. Joy is much better. I've complained, and I've encouraged myself. Encouragement is what helped me. I've been hopeless, and I've walked in expectancy. Expectancy is where I live. Honestly, I can't even articulate into words how at peace I am with where I am in life. I pray you find the same peace. Then and only then can you prepare to receive all that God has is store. And know that God can't bless you with who He has for you until you let go of the people that were never attached to His will for your life. Sis, leave that man alone. You know in your heart he isn't God's best for you. Bro, look beyond her physical. Do you see fruit baring life? Just a little food for thought. I pray you're Holy Spirit lead in your choices. Yeah, that's what's needed in this hour. Holy Ghost led folk. It time to bring real marriage back. It's time to display holy examples. Will & Jada are cool, but have you looked at Rebekkah & Isaac? Read Genesis 24. Now that's how a hook-up is made. I'm telling you, the world ain't got nothing on a God thing honey (smile)!
Be encourage. God hasn't forgotten you. He knows your name. He has already completed the work. You just have to await the manifestation. While you're waiting, occupy until He comes.
Stop stressing.
Exhale already.
Purple was never you color anyway (smile).
I love you
Nikki Washington, CEO
Glowmagazineonline.com
"It's already done, done!
